Whole 30: Week 1 Recap

Hey hey!  How was everyone's winter break?  Ours was glorious!  Filled with tons of playing, friends, family and art.  The kids and I were both bummed when Monday morning rolled around and they had to go back to school.

The other thing that as quite the bummer about Monday was Mark and I starting the Whole 30.  Are you familiar with it?  It's basically 30 days of eating nothing processed, no dairy, grains, soy (or legumes of any kind), MSG, or anything that tastes delicious.  The point of it is to 'reset' your system, relearn how to eat the way nature intended (eating until satiety, instead of engorgement), and to just generally feel better.  We've done this once before, 2 years ago, and both loved the way that we felt, so we decided to do it again!

We started on January fifth, so today is day 8 for us.  I feel like I'm finally turning the 'bloated, withdrawing from sugar/carbs' hump, and am feeling good!  I've also made my way back to the gym, where I am spending way too much time working on my upper body.  I'm only cleared from the ribcage up, so I'm basically turning these shoulders into boulders, and I'm trading in my boobs for pecs.  Sexy, like a man.  Anyways.  I've made some super delicious recipes this week, and wanted to share my top 3 with you guys!

Cinnamon Roasted Butternut Squash 

(Recipe from Make With Your Hands)

Ingredients:
1 whole butter nut squash (3 c. cubed)
2 tbs. coconut oil (melted)
1/2 tbs. dark cinnamon
1/2 tsp. nutmeg
1 tbs. fresh ground black pepper

Directions:
Preheat the oven to 400 degrees.  Toss squash, coconut oil & cinnamon together until all of the squash is thoroughly coated with oil and cinnamon.  Lay the butternut squash on a parchment lined baking sheet, or silpat and bake for 35 minutes.  Pull it out of the oven and  immediately toss with the nutmeg and pepper.  Put it back on the baking sheet and allow it to cool.

Seriously, this is delicious.  Use the full TBSP of pepper.  The nuttiness of the nutmeg, combined with the spiciness of the pepper and the sweetness of the cinnamon is an unreal combination.

Chipotle Meatballs  

(Recipe from Health-Bent)

Ingredients

1 lb ground meat (we used beef)
1/4 c almond flour
2 eggs
1 T chipotle adobo sauce 
1 t dried oregano
1 t onion powder
1 t garlic powder
salt

For the Sauce

1 c chicken stock
15 oz can tomato sauce
1-2 finely diced chipotle peppers in adobo sauce or you could use just sauce
2 t dried oregano
2 t onion powder
1 t garlic powder
salt

Directions

Preheat your oven to 400 degrees.  Combine all of the ingredients for the meatballs, and roll into small, 1.5 inch x 1.5 inch balls.  Bake for 15-20 minutes.  While the meatballs are cooking combine all ingredients for the sauce in a saucepan over medium-low heat, and allow to simmer until it reaches desired thickness.  We served these over roasted spaghetti squash with a side of avocado, because this is a spicy recipe!  The original recipe serves it with a side of guacamole.

These meatballs are delicious!  But, our favorite part about them is the sauce.  Because you can't have ketchup or BBQ sauce on the Whole 30, things sometimes seem a bit dry.  This sauce is the perfect solution!  

Bulletproof Coffee

Ok, let's talk about this one.  I was nervous about it too.  It crossed my radar a long time ago, and I immediately thought "Yuck! Hell to the no!"  But, I decided that I needed to woman up, and give it a go, and I am so thankful that I did!  That first day that I tried it I was like the freaking energizer bunny.  I could not sit still!  Which was kind of a bummer, because my bursitis was CRAZY bad, and it hurt me to move, and I couldn't bring myself to sit still.  I didn't make true bulletproof coffee because I'm not having dairy, and the real recipe calls for butter.  Anyways, give it a try!  

Ingredients:

1 tbsp Coconut Oil (virgin coconut oil gives a stronger flavor, so if you don't like coconut just look for regular coconut oil)

1 cup of brewed coffee.

Directions

In a blender combine the coffee and oil and blend until frothy.  I used an immersion blender in my cup, because I hate doing dishes.

Let me know if you have any questions!  These are my top 3 recipes, but I made SO many more!  Missing all of my food posts on Instagram?  Don't fret, I made a new account, just food and fitness related.  Follow me @kendalgetsfit. 

I'm not going to make it to Christmas break.

Remember last year, or maybe the year before when this blog about the end of the school year was making the rounds? I swear, that mom and I could be BEST FRIENDS FOREVER. She just gets that the end of the school year is basically parties and not even worth the energy it takes to get your kids to school. But here's the thing, it's December and I already feel that way. Like, she's limping across the finish line and I'm not even at the halfway mark yet, and I totally give up.

I should have known that this year was doomed for failure when I lied on Reese's reading log on the first week of school. Twenty minutes a night is overkill anyways. But seriously, I had no idea that today was Reese's class party. Apparently the email AND the paper flyer that came home last Friday didn't make it through my "fuck school" mentality. Or, maybe, just maybe I blacked out the thought that I would have to get through an entire morning routine, with three children, two of which hate the mornings, for my child to learn nothing and party all day. And these party people are the people trying to convince me that twenty minutes a night is important? Oh girl.

And the thing is, the kids are just as done as I am. Camden doesn't start school until 11:20, and this morning I let him have a PJ play date from 8am until it was time to go to school. Don't worry, I set aside five minutes for him to change his clothes and brush his teeth. The Elf isn't even helping anymore. They realize that his beady little eyes can only follow you so far, and then they're on their own. They act like little angels in front of Snowflake, and as soon as they're out of eye shot they turn into wild children who might be being raised by wolves. It's like I'm raising criminals, and training them to only be bad when the police aren't watching.

Everett hasn't even had a nap this week, because four of five days have been early release. Dude, just give us all five days. OR. Bundle all those early release hours up and let us start Christmas break one day early. Both big kids are having two days of parties this week, so I'm thinking that the only people more done than I am are the teachers. Today when I was volunteering in Camden's class I'm 98% sure that we were teaching the kindergarteners how to play craps. I mean, it's a life skill so I happily participated. Plus, I have no idea how to play craps (because pregnant at 19, obvi) so we both learned something.

We are so, so close to the end of this week, and tomorrow is even PJ day, so I don't even have to get anyone dressed. Two more lunches to pack, two more reading logs to forge, two more drop offs and we are done for two whole weeks. Cheers to that!

Movement Without Fear

In super exciting news, I had my 3 month post op appointment last week!  Here we are, three months and some change, well on the road to recovery, and I'm still in pain.  When I went into this surgery people who knew me and loved me were so optimistic for me.  I constantly heard "You're so young, and in great shape, you'll heal so much faster than you think!"  I took that sentence to heart, and clung to it for dear life.

I was so scared going into surgery.  Every single thing was unknown.  Will we be able to do it arthroscopically or will it have to be an open incision?  Can we repair the cartilage or will we have to shave it down?  What other damage is there?  Even the morning of surgery, talking to my doctor there was no clear plan, but more of a "here are the three options that I am comfortable doing today."  My surgery was supposed to take 2 hours, and it ended up taking 5.  Instead of my doctor just doing one of the possible surgeries he did all three.  My labrum was able to be repaired instead of shaved, but it was completely detached and is now held into place by 6 suture anchors.  He had to shave 1/2 an inch of bone off of my hip in one spot alone.  I had two different types of impingement that had to be corrected. All of this to say, it didn't matter how young I am, or what good shape I was in, I had every worst case scenario and this wasn't going to be a smooth and easy recovery.

I think that's what has caught me the most off guard.  Just how slow this process is.  But is it always this slow?  No.  There are much milder versions of this surgery, I just didn't have any of them.  Going into this I had read all of the blogs, and the medical websites, and everything I could, and while reading on paper how slow it was didn't phase me, living it has just about killed me.  Six weeks ago I was cleared to walk my kids to school.  That's it.  That's as far as I was allowed to go.  "Healing takes time, and we want the right amount of scar tissue to form, and my bone was so freshly shaved."  I heard these words, but I hated them.

When I woke up from my surgery I thought that every day would be better, and I would be pain free in no time.  But the truth is, you don't wake up pain free.  There is no one day 'ah-ha!' moment.  You are still in pain.  The sky is still blue.  It's a new kind of pain, and it's scary.  You've just undergone 5 hours of hellacious surgery, were stuck to your couch for 6 weeks, are barely allowed to walk 1/4 of a mile, and you're still in fucking pain.  The pain is getting better.  It isn't something that stops me from doing things anymore, and three months and some change later I can say that it is better than the day that I went in for surgery.  Did I mention that this process is slow?

With all that being said, I still am afraid with most of my movements.  Random things catch me off guard, the twisting of my leg just wrong, bending just at the wrong angle, getting out of bed wrong.  Every move that I make is a conscious one.  The other day in the grocery store Camden accidentally kicked the side of my foot while he was running by me, and it caused my foot to turn out, and the amount of pain that I was in at that moment almost dropped me to the ground in tears.

Last week my doctor cleared me to walk as far as I want!  I didn't realize at the time what that meant to me.  I didn't realize it until yesterday when I took Everett and the dog on a 1.25 mile walk.  Clearly it isn't a far distance, but there was this beautiful moment, walking down a trail, on such a gorgeous day, with the sun was shining, the trees such a vibrant green, and I just felt free.  Like all of this was finally becoming worth it.  It was such an emotional moment, one that I didn't know I needed, but was so, so needed.  This is the path that I couldn't wait to be on.  Taking my toddler on a walk, stopping to bend down and look at the streams, zigging and zagging, and just living.

I still have three more months until I can go back to things like running, and the gym.  But, I did get cleared to work my back, shoulders & chest at the gym!  Woot, I'm about to be that 'don't forget leg day' meme making the rounds.

Sunday Funday!

I have this shirt, and I'm trying really hard to love it.  It's soft, and cozy, and a little bit big, and really really comfortable.  But, it's a flannel plaid, and I'm fairly certain that I look like a lumberjack in it.  In fact, I bet that if I were to go to Home Depot right now they'd look at me and be like "Nah, she doesn't need any help, she's got this." To make matters worse I'm currently using a pencil to keep my hair up in a bun, because why not?  This is why you try on clothes before you buy them.

Speaking of buying, I am feeling so jaded by this Christmas season.  This morning Mark and I took the kids to see Big Hero 6 (totally adorable, and worth going to see), and there was an entire preview where every Disney character was asking a kid "What'dya get?"  Seriously?  Ridiculous.  I'm so over Disney right now that it's also ridiculous, but that's another post for another time.  Anyways, back to my point.  This Christmas break the kids and I are going to focus on acts of service, and giving our time to people who aren't as lucky as we are.  We are going to sit down and brainstorm one to two things each that we can accomplish.  Anyone have any ideas?  I was thinking the SPCA for Cam, and something involving the Sacramento Children's House for Reese.  

Oh my gosh!  I finally did it.  I stepped on the scale for the very first time post surgery.  It is seriously the most nerve wracking thing ever!  I've been wanting to do it for weeks, but it stresses me out so badly that I have to do it in a quick wave of courage.  Scales should cause 100% less anxiety than this.  Anyways, I was so pleasantly surprised!  I've lost 4 pounds since surgery, which puts me at 134lbs.  You know what that means?  I've officially lost 20lbs since May 1st!  I realize that it's 6 months, and that the bulk of that weight was lost in the first 9 weeks, however, what I'm most excited about is that I haven't yo-yo'd!  I've maintained or slowly lost.  This has totally motivated me to get back to meal prepping, and IIFYM.  

I'm trying to start shifting my meals to be more Whole30 compliant now, so that when I start it (on Jan 1st, join me!) I don't go through major carb withdrawals.  I still haven't bit the bullet and tried Bulletproof Coffee, but I want to.  I just get so sad at the thought of only starting my day with one cup of coffee.  I don't even think that I turn into a nice person until I reach the bottom of my second cup. And, that's a lot of butter.  Have you tried it?  Let me know what you think of it!

How I Ruined the Baby.

Do you guys do Elf on the Shelf?  I seriously love that little thing.  Nothing says "Santa's watching!" like a tiny little person shaped stuffed animals, whose beady little eyes follow your every move.  It's like she's daring my kids to misbehave, and they know that the consequences won't be worth it, so they act like little angels.  Do you think I can keep this going until July?  Cause I'm thinking I should.

Ooh!  This weekend the Christmas season officially kicks off for us!  I'm so excited.  Reese is in the towns holiday parade and tree lighting ceremony on Saturday.  It's super, super cute.  And then I have a cookie exchange party, and I have zero ideas for what kinds of cookies to make.  Anyone have a great recipe?  Last year I did almond shortbread with raspberry thumbprints.  They were delicious, but I'm thinking I should go more for chocolate this year.

I am so bored these days.  I have so much extra energy, and nothing to funnel it into.  My kids sports are over, so now all of my afternoons are free.  So I'll sit down to play with my kids and they don't want to play with me, they want to go outside and play with their friends!  I don't even know what to do with this free time.  Oh wait, yes I do.  Cleave onto Everett like he's the last baby on earth, and possibly ruin him for all time.  He's just so cute that when he's naughty I can't even do anything about it.  Yesterday he had a Gogurt, and I told him to go and eat it in the kitchen and he straight up said "Nope."  RUINED.  He has the sweetest little voice though, so when things like that come out of his mouth I just die of cuteness.  And then he gets even worse.   It's a vicious cycle, and I'm playing right into it.  Last night he was throwing a tantrum because he wanted to play with the iPad, and we don't let the kids use technology on school days, and I said "Snowflake (the elf) is watching you, do you want her to tell Santa not to bring you any toys?"  that little turkey said "Yes!"  

I really, really want to go back to the gym.  I'm getting so strong at my day to day activities that sometimes I forget that I really am still recovering, and need to take it easy.  Black Friday was the perfect reminder.  I shopped all night with a friend, and by the last store I could physically not walk anymore.  It took me three days to recover from that.  I see the doctor next week and I will see what he says about me joining and doing some upper body work.  I haven't really been cleared to engage my core yet because of where my incisions are, that the muscles and cartilage in my upper thigh/right where my hip bends are still healing.  Whomp, whomp, whomp, another week just gives my body time to get stronger, and heal more.  But!  I'm 100% done Christmas shopping now.  I just need the rain to stop so that we can go and get a tree.

Tuesday Ramblings

Parenting is like walking a tight rope sometimes.  You love your kids more than anyone in the world, and you genuinely see the best in them 99% of the time, which leaves you in a serious pickle when you notice that they really suck at something.  So the thing is, Reese loves to sing.  We used to joke when she was little that she lived her life like a Disney Princess, always in song.  But homegirl can't sing.  At all.  This morning she was belting out Taylor Swift and I was so sure that the dogs were going to start howling it was that bad.  She does this weird, deep, man voice.  I can't even describe it so just know that it's painful.  But, how do I tell her that?!  I'm her mom, and I think that the sun shines out of her little booty, so if I think it's bad can you imagine what other people think?  And here's the thing, I don't care if she belts out tunes at home, or with her girlfriends, or anywhere else for that matter.  Singing and dancing is fun!  But I mean, I have to interfere before she goes on American Idol.  I don't ever want her to feel public humiliation.

Or, maybe she sings beautifully and it's just the carb withdrawals making me think that it's awful.  Probably not, though.  But onto the carb withdrawals, with the exception of Friday night I've been keeping my carbs at or below 100 grams.  It is so tough!  I know that I don't need a ton of carbs right now because I'm doing nothing that requires energy, but man oh man do they taste delicious.  I think that I might start Wednesday Weigh Ins again, just to stay on track.  It's too easy to lie to yourself, ya know?

I'm gearing up for the Whole30.  I think I'm going to focus on making a month long menu and grocery list, and try to get some of the breakfast foods cooked & frozen so that I can offset the cost in January.  Oh, and to be super prepared too.  Totally.  If you're going to do it with me, I'm reading the book It Starts With Food, so hopefully I go into it with a clearer head this time.  Last time I did it it was because Paleo was cool, now I just know that my system needs a reboot, and I wonder if it will help with the leftover bursitis in my right hip.  We shall see!

There's a Dead Body in my Backyard

Not a human body, obviously, but a dead hamster body and a dead body is a dead body.  Before we delve into the hamster funeral let's cover some basics.  Last year for Christmas, Santa brought Reese a special 'North Pole' hamster, that could never be replaced so she had to take super good care of it.  And for the most part she did.  Except for the incident, which was all Camden's fault, and Reese has no idea.

The incident started out like any other day, Reese off to school and Cam, Evi and I home playing. Camden asked if he could go play with the hamster, and I said yes.  He goes upstairs, gets the hamster and starts playing.  Two things I want to interject with here.  The first is that Camden was always so gentle with the hamster that I never worried when he had it.  The second is that I am a naive fool.  So a few minutes later Camden starts screaming for me about something being wrong with Mr. Nibbles.  I run upstairs and find a hamster that has been beaten to death by a plastic shark.  I totally panic, contemplate sending Camden to future serial killer rehab, and then do what any good mom would do and lie and say that the hamster is just taking a nap.  And then I replace the dead hamster with a live one.  And that is how the first Mr. Nibbles met his untimely end.

Now, the hamster that we replaced Mr. Nibbles the first wasn't an exact match color wise, so we continue our train of lies and tell Reese that it's 'molting.'  The thing about Mr. Nibbles II is that he's a dick, and won't let any of the kids get close to him.  I guess that when hamsters molt their personalities also change, but that once the molting process is done, they go back to normal.  Our kids are going to be so messed up as adults.  The original Mr. Nibbles was such a nice, friendly rodent that we couldn't leave a dick in it's place, so I return him to Petsmart.  Have you ever returned a pet to a pet store?  They look at you like you're a monster who might be raising a serial killer.  Little did they know that only half of that is true.  But seriously, you work at a store that mass breeds small rodents for profit, you aren't exactly in the moral high ground on this one.  So, after many dirty looks I return Mr. Nibbles II and buy Mr. Nibbles III.  Clearly I made the third hamster purchase at a different pet store so that my name didn't go into some database.

Anyways, onto Mr. Nibbles III.  He replaced the original Mr. Nibbles perfectly!  He was friendly, almost a completely different color, but it's fine, it's just what he molted into, and Reese was none the wiser.  She really is so pretty.  Have you ever had small children and a hamster?  That thing is worth every cent of the $8 you spent on it.  It entertains them for hours!  That poor hamster was regularly an ice cream man, part of Barbies dream life, a pirate, or any other variation of their imagination.  At one point they trained the hamster to go through a maze for a treat.  Seriously, get your kids a hamster, you'll never have to make up things for them to do again.

Well, the other night things didn't go so well.  I asked Reese to make sure that Mr. Nibbles III had food and water and when she went to pet him she discovered his cold, stiff little body.  Actually, first she picked it up, noticed that it was dead and then threw it back into his cage.  I think that both of us might be scarred for life after that.  She freaks out.  That might be an understatement.  She spends a solid hour sobbing and chanting "I....want....Mr.....Nibbles..." over, and over, and over again.  To distract her we decide to have a funeral.

Hamster funerals are quite interesting.  They're basically real funerals for a tiny rodent that you aren't really sad is dead, so you have no idea how to act.  Let me just break it down for you.  First, you have to pick out a casket.  A shoebox will do just fine.  But you can't just bury a dead hamster in a shoebox, you have to make sure it'll be comfortable in the afterlife.  So you fill it with it's bedding and wrap the dead rodent in a rag that you've been begging your kid to get rid of forever and then you tape the shit out of that box.  No need to chance the dogs digging up and ripping into that box.  Could you just imagine, Reese coming home from school only to see little bits of hamster fluff all over the backyard?  I could never afford the therapy bills.

Then you have to bury the box.  Interesting fact, this is significantly easier to do in the movies than in real life.  Mark starts to dig and gets like 18" down before he hits straight clay and rock.  You can't dig through that shit with a shovel, so that's as deep as that hole gets.  You put the taped-to-shit casket in the hole, and then, because you've watched way too much CSI know to sprinkle kitty litter in that hole to absorb the rotting animal smell.  At this point both your child and husband will be crying.  It's fine though, because the third step of rodent funerals is the eulogy.

This part is very sweet, and touching.  Reese had written Mr. Nibbles III a note, which she read out loud (after a motivational speech, given by Mark).  Even heartless I got a little bit choked up at this part.

To close the funeral out your crying husband should give the Lord's Prayer while you silently wonder if you should be preparing light appetizers and cocktails for the reception to follow.  At that point I remembered that is was almost 9pm, and that showers were to follow this event, not cocktails and usher everyone inside.

And then, the next day your 8 year old daughter and all of her friends have the most morbid playdate ever, and reenact the funeral, complete with sobbing, a moment of silence and fighting.

And that is the story of how there is now a dead body in my backyard.  RIP Mr. Nibbles III.